Well, it IS sliced. (Insert your favorite pork joke -- go ahead, it's easy).
(You'll HAVE TO click on pic or above link to read)
Sunday, July 19, 2009
Bayou pic of the weekend: Pork!
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Daybreaker: A billion dollar fine for Exxon?
Ay carumba! If this happens, those record profits might come in handy.
According to the Texas General Land Office, Exxon Mobil Corp. might, just might, be liable for up to $1 BILLION (!) in fines "for 'malicious' sabotage of wells to prevent other producers from tapping fields it no longer wanted."
Sounds sinister, but is it? And $1 billion!?!! How on earth do they arrive at such a monstrous number? Grab your Fisher-Price™ abacus and follow us:"Jerry Patterson, commissioner of the land office that oversees oil leases that help fund Texas schools, asked the Texas Railroad Commission to conduct hearings into an alleged 1990s program at Exxon Mobil of plugging abandoned wells with trash, sludge, explosives and cement plugs. The barriers made it impossible for other producers to revive the wells, Patterson said in a statement he gave to Bloomberg News yesterday. Under Railroad Commission rules, Exxon Mobil could face fines of $10,000 a day per well, Patterson said in the statement, which he plans to release on July 20. He said those penalties could add up to more than $1 billion on wells the company abandoned in 1991 after a disagreement over royalties with the owners, the O’Connor family, a Texas oil dynasty."
Huh?!?!? This is the same Jerry Patterson that wants to fill-in Rollover Pass. To some, he's not exactly a friend of Southeast Texas. Sticking Exxon Mobil with a $1 billion bar tab might just render him -- and his agency -- public enemy #1 'round these parts. After all, slamming one of the major SETX employers with a gut-busting fine ain't exactly good for bizness. Not that Jerry worries his pretty little head over such details.
Heck, with an extra billion in the coffers; we'd all be giggling at that silly little recession plaguing the rest of America.
As for Exxon, they deny the allegations, claiming that since the water table in these areas is so close to the surface -- plugging the wells was a necessary safety precaution.
With all the legal muscle behind Exxon, we doubt this will even see the light of day. Still, the Texas General Land Office is most certainly not afraid to go after one of the big boys. Unfortunately for them, if this turns into a schoolyard brawl -- Exxon has way more "friends" in their end of the sandbox.
TRY THESE, THEY COST LESS
Friday, July 17, 2009
Bayou mailbag: Saurian salutation
Enterprise reader, Jerry, checked in with his feelings on our weekly Friday "print" column. Normally, we'd add this note to the comments section of the original post.
But we loved Jerry's salutation so much, that we decided to give him the floor. Despite the fact that he completely disagrees with us. Name calling will get you far -- if it's the right name.
* * * *
Dear Saurian:* * * *
You were off base in your comments about unsupervised children at the Bozeman, Montana shopping mall. Twelve year olds do not have the maturity to properly supervise small children, as their conduct demonstrated. The comparison with pre teens working in the past on a family farm or business is invalid, as well. In those instances, children were not being exposed to strangers in areas outside the family residence. Past history is replete with stories of children being injured at the farm, and current events show us the dangers of exposure to deviants at shopping malls and other public places. The mall cop may have overreacted, but his concerns for the safety of the children were absolutely correct. The complaining lady abdicated her role as a mother. Did you really want malls to post signs about proper care and supervision of children? Courts have decided that businesses must ensure the general safety and security of patrons, and they can be sued if they fail to do so. We cannot sue the mother for failing in these respects, but we can only hope that her public embarrassment will serve as a lesson to her and others who want to use malls as babysitters.
Bayou pic of the day: "The fiery-hot breath of flaming demons"
From satellite images taken on July 15th. Either that is some serious pollution over our neck of the woods OR we have a visual depiction of what Hell's winds look like. To quote the original blog that posted these images:"The fiery-hot breath of flaming demons, stoke “The Summer from Hell, ” roasting Texans in their own juices."
Now that sounds uplifting. Last we checked, Texas was ALWAYS hot in the summer. This drought, on the other hand. Demons? As good an explanation as any. 
[Click it to big it, Source]
Breakin' and entering: The sign is intimidating, the Jeff. Co. Courthouse is not
Apparently, this sign is kinda, sorta useless.
According to an article in this morning's Enterprise, a nutty grudge-bearin' fellow waltzed into the Jeff. Co. Courthouse and into the office of Justice of the Peace Vi McGinnis. 62-year-old Richard Wilson was able to break through the courthouse's fortress-like security and enter McGinnis's offic...oh wait, he might not have gone through security? He didn't have to? Huh."More than Wilson's actions, McGinnis is concerned about the safety of her staff and others in the northwest wing of the Jefferson County courthouse where no security team searches people who enter. Only courthouse visitors who enter through the main lobby empty their pockets and are scanned using metal detectors."
So millions of dollars later, and one intimidating sign, courthouse security is still REALLY lacking. As a matter of fact, the Beaumont PD responded to the call, not the courthouse security guards (busy checking old lady's purses for ninja pins, perhaps). And after the whole event, Wilson wasn't initially arrested (he is now hanging out at the Jeff. Co. Correctional Facility on a $25K bond)."McGinnis feels that Wilson should have been arrested immediately rather than being escorted out. Although she later notified courthouse security, she was told Wilson's words did not constitute an offense. She then contacted Beaumont Police Department officers, who went to work on an arrest warrant. Sheriff Mitch Woods, who is in charge of the courthouse guards, said he is not happy about how the situation was handled by his office."
Glad we're not a Justice of the Peace; working in that security sieve must be terrifying.
Daybreaker: A SETX stalwart sinks its teeth into the war on terror
Now THIS we can believe.
All of the talk about torture "enhanced-interrogation techniques" has been a "Cheney said - they said" death match. But a new report has us convinced that the U.S. was brutally torturing terror suspects. Call us 100% convinced.
Why?
A memo has been unearthed that claims a high-ranking CIA official used the ultimate weapon in the battle to break al Qaeda: FIRE ANTS! Nooooooooooooooooooo!
Here is what allegedly went down:"So what is one to make of his bizarre claim to have used fire ants to get a terrorist suspect to talk? When [the CIA supervisor] made the boast, according to officials familiar with the events, he was at the CIA's bar at "The Farm," where the CIA trains case officer cadets, down at Camp Peary in Virginia. It's an old U-shaped bar, as officers describe it, topped with cheap linoleum, and a couple of little booths like those found in an old cafeteria. The room opens up to a large lounge with a big open fireplace. Back in the old days, the area was decorated with photographs from Southeast Asia and other regions of CIA derring-do, but now it is a dreary place.
Torment is right. These little buggers have been tormenting Southeast Texans for years. It's about time the government put these tiny "illegal immigrants" to work; have 'em earn their keep.
According to those who were told about the incident, the official was putting down drink after drink at the bar. "He was running his mouth," said one ex-officer, "carrying on." Sources say the supervisor bragged loudly that he had used fire ants to torment an al Qaeda suspect to get him to talk. As one version of the evening has it, he bragged of putting the stinging bugs in a helmet and then putting the helmet on the detainee."
Tell you what, you put a handful of those critters on our head -- we'll tell you we shot JFK just to get a little relief. We say give 'em hell, fire ants. At least Southeast Texas is doin' its part to help fight the war on terror: one bite at a time.
C'MON, THESE WON'T BITE
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Shaken and Slurred: Two Texas radio jocks talk themselves into hot water
Bayou reader, Ashley, called this to our attention.
Two radio jocks at KLBJ-AM, an Austin talk station have been suspended for two weeks (without pay) for the repeated use of a not-so-nice ethnic term. Don Pryor and Todd Jeffries got into a discussion about what terms were acceptable to use when referring to illegal immigrants. Why you'd wade into this discussion in a state with such a massive Hispanic population is questionable.
And predictably, the Greater Austin Hispanic Chamber of Commerce and every Hispanic group from here to Mexico is up in arms.
You can hear the "offensive" bit here. We don't have to warn you that it contains the use of a term that many Hispanics consider derogatory.
Didja listen?
If not, here is what was said:"Pryor began using the word during a discussion at the outset of the show about labels used to describe people who are in the country illegally. Jeffries noted that the USA Today newspaper uses the term "illegal immigrants" but not the words "illegal" or "illegals" as nouns and avoids using the term "alien" unless it's in a direct quote.
Pryor says he was using "humor cloaked in racism." That must've been what Don Imus was thinking years ago, when he referred to the members of the Rutgers Ladies Basketball team as "nappy-headed hos." So freakin' funny.
"OK, so that's not PC," Pryor said. When Jeffries said that the National Council of La Raza, the Hispanic advocacy group, encourages the use of "undocumented immigrants" or "undocumented workers," Pryor asked: "Whatever happened to the good old word 'wetback'? What was wrong with that?"
"Inappropriate," Jeffries responded."
Actually, it's lazy. It's humor you don't have to work all that hard at. And it is what happens when fat-cat radio/TV personalities get too comfortable. They resort to stereotypes for a quick giggle. We'd have more respect for these overblown clowns if they actually spent some time crafting jokes. You know, things that are actually funny.
Their real crime ain't racism (after all, folks need to relax, take a deep breath and step away from the PC labels). Nope. Their true offense is sucking at their jobs. And that, folks, is grounds for dismissal.
Brit Law 101: Is Harry Potter author a "potential" pedophile?
That new Harry Potter film just opened, and hundreds of SETX fans dressed in their "wizardy" best attended Midnight showings. But did you know that they were watching the creation of a woman who will soon be considered a "potential" pedophile?
True dat.
This fall, Harry Potter author -- J.K. Rowling -- as well as a host of other prominent British children's book scribes will be required to register a "potential pedophiles."
The UK government is requiring that ALL authors who visit schools MUST register as part of a national database designed to protect children from predators."Beginning October 12, 2009, the Vetting and Barring Scheme (VBS) will require that all adults who work with children, including authors such as J.K. Rowling and Philip Pullman if they make special visits to schools, will be required to register with the database for a fee of £64 ($105). A government spokesperson defended the new rigorous regulation, saying, 'The new scheme means every individual working in a field that requires more than a tiny amount of contact with children and/or vulnerable adults will have to be vetted. If they are passed, they will be placed on a register that says they are allowed to work in a regulated field. If they are barred, they will go on a separate register and it will be a criminal offence for them to try and obtain work in a regulated field, carrying a penalty of up to five years in prison. It will also be illegal for anyone to employ them.'"
Holy hysteria! Can you say "can o' worms?" This gives the powers that be an awful lot of say-so over folk's livelyhoods. If someone high up doesn't like your work or has "personal" issues with you, who's to say they can't "blackball" you? Forever.
If this were in America, the President would have to register when he makes visits to school children. 'Member Bush on 9/11?
It's a sad day when public paper pushers can pass laws, guided by pure paranoia, that impinge on the rights of citizens. Hmmm, now that sounds familiar, don't it?
Put a lid on it: Beaumonter shows us how he "rocks" it
Y'all are lucky we're here. Where else are you gonna see this kind informational programming. NO! WHERE! ELSE! From the "fashion" website: That's My Lid.
Who knew Beaumont was on the cutting edge of hip-hop fashion? Some guy named Corn (was Soy busy?) checks in with Beaumonter, Brian Clark, to "speak on his personal style, how he rocks his lid, and the swagg in Beaumont, Texas."
Swagg? Wait right here while we look it up...
Alright, this gives us an idea. We can start our own "lifestyle site", something like "That's My Sweaty Sock." Y'all can see how we "rock" the $1.50 tube socks -- Southeast Texas-style. Winner, no?
Daybreaker: Jamaal Charles caught in the act in Vegas
They say what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas. But that's only true if you're a nobody -- like us. If you're NFL running back and Port Arthur native, Jamaal Charles, your trip to Vegas gets debated, dissected and dissed on the internet.
Charles was spotted in Sin City last weekend by a rabid Kansas City Chiefs fan, who then ran to the nearest internet connection he could find to post this eyewitness account onto a superfan message board (warning: some not-so-nice language and questionable images appear at the link).
'Dems the breaks when you can run a 4.4. 40-yard dash.
The initial post was purely informational. It read: "The dude is way more built than I thought, he always looked so small on TV. Anyways, I saw him at Pure and Ghostbar last week with his entourage, I thought it was pretty cool. Had some smokin hot chicks with him, dammnnnnnnn!"
From there, the board decides to debate whether or not Charles deserves to have an entourage with him. This repartee was of the highest intellectual quality. It was kind of like going to a meeting of the "Shut-ins of America" club. Most enlightening.
One member of the board is simply stunned:"Entourage. A ****ing backup running back on a ****ing 2-14 team with an "entourage". **** him I hope he blows out his mother****ing knee."
Well played, sir! You must reside in your parent's basement and live on nothing but Cheetos and weed. Are we right? Of course we are.
Another thinks it's a good "legal" move. You know, if things get outta hand. And he's right, that is how we roll -- seven deep, at minimum.
Don't get us wrong, we like Charles. By all accounts, he's a good kid. But he is swimming in the deep end now. One commenter seems to capture to general mood of your average message board "troll" with this heartfelt post:"You should have asked him how he gets caught from behind on a frickin' screen pass by a linebacker at the 1 yardline. tracks (sic) star my ass."
Good, constructive criticism -- reminds of this classic bit. Ah, the price of fame.
JUDGE THESE
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Armed and naked: Louisiana woman ferociously defends her right to "bare" arms
What's wrong with a little "self-expression?" Apparently, quite a bit.
A Louisiana woman -- 28-year-old Tanya McKnight -- is in police custody after allegedly stabbing her roommate. It seems her roomie didn't appreciate her lack of, um, clothing. Tanya, you see, enjoyed living in the nude.
The disagreement got so heated that the "nekkid" roomie grabbed a knife and stabbed her more modest housemate."The victim told police McKnight repeatedly told her she was going to kill her while she was stabbing her, the affidavit said. Police recovered a knife at the scene with a blue handle that matched the victim’s description of the weapon, the affidavit said."
Armed and naked; now there's a dangerous combination. Still, we'd like to inform Ms. McKnight that we at the Bayou have absolutely no problem with her need to "express herself." She can room with us anytime -- we'll just have to switch over to plastic cutlery.
How old is old enough? Mom arrested for letting her kids go shopping
Plenty of folks use the mall as a place to beat the heat. Just the other day, we saw what seemed like hundreds of kids hanging out at Parkdale -- snapping gum and carousing with friends. And plenty of them appeared to be no older than middle-school age.
This came to mind when we ran across this blog entry:
"I was charged with endangering the welfare of my children, a criminal charge that, in the city where I live, Bozeman, Montana, can lead to imprisonment in the county jail. The Montana Code 46-16-130(3) states that a parent can be charged with this offense if she “knowingly endangers the child’s welfare by violating a duty of care, protection, or support.” Typically, prosecution is pursued when an adult supplies a child younger than eighteen with drugs, prostitutes the child, abandons the child’s home, or engages in sexual conduct with the child. A violation of duty of care is described as cruel treatment, abuse, infliction of unnecessary and cruel punishment, abandonment, neglect, lack of proper medical care, clothing, shelter, and food, and evidence of bodily injury. I was charged with this crime because I dropped my three children and their two friends off at the Mall.There were five children in question: two 12-years-old girls, both accomplished babysitters (knew CPR and had been left in-charge of other neighborhood children many times prior) were in-charge. They were supervising three other children: ages 8, 7 and 3.
About an hour after she dropped them off, the parents were phoned and told to come down to the mall. This is what happened:
"As soon as we entered the office, I was confronted by two Bozeman city police officers. One told me that what I had done was completely unacceptable in his opinion and that he was going to arrest me for endangering the welfare of my children. I asked him if there was a mall age limit that I was not aware of. He told me to be quiet. I tried to explain to him that I had faith in my daughter’s skills and in the safety of the mall, and that I was not an endangering parent. As I tried to keep talking, desperate to clear up what was obviously nothing more than a huge misunderstanding, he warned me that if I “went crazy” on him, he would handcuff me right in front of the children and take me away to jail for the night. He said he had called child services already. They would either arrive at the mall shortly or get his report and be visiting my home this week to check in."Parkdale Mall has a policy on the matter, sort of -- according to their rules and regulations:
"Attendance of children (under age 18) during school hours unaccompanied by a parent, teacher or legal guardian (excluding school holidays and home schooled students) [is not allowed]. Unaccompanied children ages 16-17 may produce proof of reduced school hours or completion thereof."Outside of this, there do not appear to be set age limits for children at the mall. They do ask that you "never leave children unattended." But no age guidelines seem to be in place.
That is what happened in this case. The two older girls went in to try on some clothes and left the three other children outside the dressing room -- something they were told by their parents not to do. "Paul Blart: Mall Cop" was alerted to the situation, dropped his Hunan takeout and leapt into action.
Thousands of taxpayer dollars later, prosecution and juries called, the mom -- who refused to plead guilty -- was given a punishment of community service. Not so long ago, many 12-year-old kids were already working on the family farm, operating heavy machinery and helping support the family. Now, a few hours at the mall constitutes a felony.
Good grief, whatever happened to prosecuting real criminals? Heck, in Jeff. Co., kid touching gets you a sentence of extended probation. More specifically, where did parental choice go? If there were no signs or rules posted concerning children at the mall, what did this mom do that was so wrong? Aside from trying to teach her kids how to be responsible? Is that now a crime?
Daybreaker: T. Boone might be rich, but he steals concrete
Sad, little T. Boone Pickens has had a rough couple of weeks. He needs him a hug. Any volunteers willing to give the old bird a big squeeze?
The past few weeks have been trying for the Texas zillionaire. Last week, he put the (temporary) kibosh on plans to build the world's largest wind farm -- a massive 4,000-megawatt complex on the Texas panhandle. Seems the powers that be refused to build him (at little cost) the heavy-duty electricity lines required to carry the power from his wind farm to it's destination. His dream of a giant wind tunnel now dust in the wind. Oh, the sadness.
Now comes the latest: An Oklahoma man has taken umbrage with Pickens over -- of all things -- a concrete slab.
David McCart was more than a tad upset when he arrived at a home he owns in Holdenville, Oklahoma to mow the lawn, only to find a big hole on his property. A hole that used to be occupied by a 3-by-5 foot piece of cement. It had vanished.
Time to call Scooby Doo and the gang.
Anyway, the vanishing slab had one distinguishing feature: etched into the face was Pickens' name (pic left, photo via Holdenville Daily News). Apparently, while McCart was absent, "crews pulled up to the driveway of a home he owns, cut out a slab containing T. Boone Pickens’ signature and drove off." No warning, no nothing.
Some history: Pickens, who grew up in the small Oklahoma town sent the crews to retrieve the sentimental cement and bring it back to his Texas ranch."As a youngster, Pickens scratched his name in the cement driveway in 1946 at his grandmother’s house, now owned by McCart. Pickens has frequently checked on the house when he visited Oklahoma. On June 22, McCart stopped by the unoccupied house so he could mow. He saw a hole where the signed concrete had been. A neighbor and passersby said a large truck with Texas tags stopped at the two-story house four days earlier. Three men with cement saws and pry bars cut out a chunk of cement and loaded it into the truck bed."
McCart later reported the incident to police. After authorities were alerted, Pickens' sent a crew back to fill-in the hole. Whatta guy!
Pickens, who owns the lion's share of water rights in North Texas, is used to these kinds of "property" disputes. And we suspect that his lawyers will do what is necessary to "win." Still, it must be nice to just take whatever you want, regardless of whether or not it's actually yours. McCart claims the cement slab was part of his property, while the city maintains it was owned by them.
Regardless, it ain't Pickens'. The "T." in T. Boone must stand for take, 'cause that seems to be what he's good at.
TAKE THESE WHILE YOU'RE AT IT
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Butter'd: I can't believe it's not Michael Jackson
We can't believe they want to make him into butter. It seems you're nobody, until the state of Iowa chooses to render your likeness out of a diary product. Anne, something needs to be done about this. Do you have any pull with the Iowa butter folks?"Plans to erect a giant statue of Michael Jackson made from butter at the Iowa State Fair are being put to the vote. Fair organisers announced their intention to create the butter tribute to the King of Pop just days after Jackson’s death. But the idea has proved so controversial that they are now to hold an online poll to decide whether or not to go ahead with it. Spokeswoman Lori Chappell says Jackson was to be part of a sculpture commemorating the 40th anniversary of Neil Armstrong’s moon landing."
The big question: will they be using something a little "lighter" -- like margarine. Either way, it's just perfect -- moon landing, outer space -- "butterized" Michael should feel right at home.
Delay of game: South Park trial pushed back, tampering allegations surface
Hear that? It's the whooshing sound of your tax dollars flying out the window.
Today was supposed to be the big day. The wheels of justice were scheduled to hear -- and rule -- on the injunction granted to the Beaumont Historical Society regarding the demolition of South Park Middle School. No dice.
The case's presiding judge, 136th District Judge Milton Shuffield (or as KFDM calls him "Sheffield"), is on vacation this week. While Shuffield is enjoying his fun in the sun, the matter has been pushed back to late July/early August.
Well, that's for now. Who knows what other housekeeping issues may arise: judge might have a hangnail or the courthouse might need a fresh coat of paint. Whatever. This thing seems like it has the shelf life of a Twinkie.
Don't be sad, though. There are developments that are certain to tide us over until the real fun can begin. Take this strange tampering accusation."The Jefferson County District Clerk has requested the sheriff investigate what she calls the "mishandling of court documents." Lolita Ramos says she wants the sheriff to find out who deceived the clerk's office and broke the law. The incident involves a document related to the possible demolition of South Park Middle School."
See if you follow: the lawyer for the Beaumont Historical Society filed a temporary retraining order with the clerk's office to prevent the BISD from demolishing the school. Instead of having his normal process server pick up a COPY of the document and serve it to the BISD, it appears someone from the District's law office retrieved the original document instead. A big no-no.
This is all minor paper wrangling. Still, Ramos maintains this has "never happened in all her time as a public servant." Until now. Did the BISD break da law? Stay tuned.
This should keep things interesting until the Judge returns -- and the real fireworks explode.
Daybreaker: KBTV's Jim Walker LOVES to "Facebook"
Social media is the gift that keeps on giving.
Take Facebook, it's a magical place where you can update all of your "friends" on your innermost thoughts. Gems like, "pizza is the new chicken wing" or "so glad that genital herpes flare-up has subsided."
Things you probably should've kept to yourself.
Take this little back-and-forth.
A KBTV viewer emailed station head, Chris Pruitt, a note about the evening newscast. Here is the full text:"Mr. Pruitt,
Pruitt pens a short, but courteous note back. No harm, no foul.
I recently moved to SE Texas and love the area! My priority is to learn all I can about my newfound community. That's where your station and the others come in. I truly love Sheldra on the anchor desk. Her warmth and wit invite me in and make me feel connected! She is a gem! I truly wish I could say the same about her co-anchor. Mr. Walker, though physically attractive, doesn't excude (sic) the same warmth or sense of caring. I get the feeling "it's all about him." That suspicion recently was confirmed for me when a co-worker introduced me to his Facebook page. I don't know why it angered me to the point of writing to you. I don't even know why I care. I guess it's because I believe you truly could have a great station that makes the community the center of its mission rather than a body building circuit boy anchor who seems more concerned about having the public adore him. My point is simple. I want to fall in love with your station, but I just can't. Thanks for listening."
The fun comes when someone (wonder who?) alerts lead anchor, Jim Walker, to the viewer letter. An avid Facebooker, Walker immediately heads to the internetz to flog the unsuspecting writer. Nevermind the fact that the viewer says IN HER LETTER that she has seen (and has access to) his Facebook page.
Walker updates his "status" to read:
(Click it to big it)
Once Walker lets the "catfight" outta the bag, the pile on begins. Walker's pals load up on the woman, tossing around words like "d*****bag" and "b***h." Walker, himself, does the most damage.
He says this during the exchange:"This woman, yes, woman-probably a bible thumbing b**ch from around here, claims she was offended. She is probably the same type that stands on her toilet, looking over her fence, calling the police because her neighbor is swimming in his backyard pool in the nude."
No he di'int!?!?!!?
A "friend" of Walker's chimes in: "she just wanted a piece of your hot bod but is pissed off cuz she wants what she can't have!"
To which Walker responds, "probably not too far off. Either that or her husband said he do me! lol."
Shut your mouth!!!!?!!?!?
OMG! So HI-larious, Jim! Can we talk? Along with every other teenager in the world, we're also on Facebook. It's fine and all -- kind of the 21st Century equivalent of an endless high school reunion. But you are the lead anchor of a network news affiliate; you hold a position of trust and power in Southeast Texas. Would Wolf Blitzer ever call someone a "b**ch" on his Twitter page? Doubt it.
Regardless of whether this woman has an agenda or not (and she very well might have), you need to take the high road. Why? 'Cause it's your job. We know that there are folks on your "friends" list that have NEVER met you, don't know you and shouldn't have access to your ultra-personal musings (does anyone really have 1,651 close pals?). You might want to consider being, um, a bit more selective. You could set up two accounts: one for personal use and another for FOX4 fans.
Futhermore, the hypocrisy of it all. During the exchange, Walker says that he's "floored by the small people out there who wouldn't dare have the b*lls to approach me in person." Isn't attacking someone on your Facebook page (who reads your site through a third party) a rather indirect way of handling a confrontation? We're just sayin'. A better reaction might have been to invite her to the station, give her a tour and introduce her around. Oh, that's right; making fun of her on Facebook is a ton easier.
Walker moves on from his cyber therapy session, but not before the damage -- and quite a bit -- has been done.
(Click it to big it)
In the end, the woman who started this whole imbroglio writes another note to Pruitt:"My intention was just to offer my opinion. It wasn't to rile Mr. Walker. I am sure he is quite capable--if not always accurate. I've learned from co-workers that Mr. Walker and his fans seem to think I called him an "airhead." Please check our earlier correspondence. That word never appeared, but words that have appeared since then in reference to me are "b**ch", "jealous b**ch", "Bible thumbing b**ch", "sill (sic) overweight b**ch", "Shoot'r in the head", and several other acts I won't dare mention. Since accuracy and discretion are not held in high regard at your station (as evidenced by the following Facebook string on the matter), I can assure you that neither my family nor my spiritual loved ones will be taking you up on your offer to check out your 'entertaining' morning show."
Could she have had an ulterior motive? Perhaps. She did send this string of correspondence to the CEO of KBTV's parent company, Nexstar, as well as the head of Nexstar human resources and an investment firm with a large stake in Nexstar. It was also sent to The Beaumont Enterprise newsroom (which is how we got wind of it). She obviously did her homework.
Heck, anyone could find out. After all, the woman’s letters have to go into KBTV’s public file -- an FCC requirement.
The bottom line: treat social media with kid gloves, you just never know who might be reading.
GO AHEAD, "FACEBOOK" THESE
Monday, July 13, 2009
No habla ingles: Gulf Coast clerk doesn't speak "criminal"
Don't know about you, but when someone comes into a convenience store wearing a mask and points a gun in your face -- chances are, you don't need a Spanish-to-English dictionary to figure out what's going on. It is part of the "universal dictionary" for: gimme yo' money.
But that is exactly what happened at a Gulf Coast quickie mart."Surveillance video taken at the west Mobile (Alabama) store shows the man holding clerk (Angelina) Geronimo at gunpoint as she places her hands over her mouth and shakes her head. The robber eventually fled with nothing, police spokesman Officer Christopher Levy said. Geronimo was not injured, according to police."
Perhaps he was looking for the restroom. Or maybe, the Asian food mart was all out of Twinkies. Honest mistake, right? More likely, the loser was "packin'" a toy gun and realized he was barking up the wrong tree.
This is the problem: these immigrant populations move in, and now an honest thief can't ply his trade. What has this world come to? Nevertheless, we dare the next convenience store employee around these parts, when confronted by an armed "customer", to pretend they don't speak English. It won't be pretty.
Bayou pic of the day: Trucks don't float in Port Arthur
From friend of the Bayou, AJ:"Guy went to sleep (Saturday) at the wheel and ended up in the intercoastal waterway. He walked away without a scratch. He was already else where upon our arrival. PAPD and PAFD were looking at how the wrecker was going to get the truck out if the water."
Talk about a rude awakening.
Daybreaker: Bill Gates is loaded, now he wants to play "God of the Gulf Coast"
Richest man in the known universe and turbo geek, Bill Gates (pictured left, doing his 'traditional' weather incantation), is expanding his horizons (either that or he's bored). No longer content to spend his billions on mosquito nets for African children (so cliché) or a cure for AIDS (so common), the former Microsoft chief is turning his attention to the weather.
No, he's not angling to be the next Al Roker (although the weight gain would be amusing). He's got bigger plans. Gates, you see, is interested in CONTROLLING the weather.
Now rub your hands together and repeat after me: Mwwwwwaaaa haaa haaaa!
And he is focused on the horrific hurricanes that have recently be plaguing the Gulf Coast -- 'member those?
Gates has invested in patents that aim to lower the water temperature of the Gulf. As we usually do, a warning that "science-like" material follows so please take necessary precautions:"In the patent filings, Gates and several other inventors plan to use large fleets of vessels to mix warm Gulf of Mexico surface water with colder water under the surface. Conduits would extend from one vessel beyond the ocean's thermocline, which is an invisible line separating the warmer, mixed layer of water closer to the surface from the cooler and calmer water that is seen further below the ocean's surface. Sunlight routinely is captured by the surface layer of ocean water, and a different vessel would be used as a heat/energy sink for water at deeper depths."
Follow that? Neither do we. We left our climatology degree in our other pants. Our hunch is that Gates and his pals are simply trying to stir up colder water and bring it to the surface, where it will -- hopefully -- render burgeoning storms less powerful.
That might be what the guy we saw yesterday at the mini-mart in Winnie was trying to do with his twelve 10-pound bags of ice. Either that, or preserve the bodies he's got stowed away in his freezer. We didn't ask.
We imagine Gates is used to success. He'll likely find out that even his billions are no match for the whims of Mother Nature.
YOU MAY NEED AN UMBRELLA FOR THESE
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Bayou pic of the weekend: Southeast Texas fire alarm
Cheap, effective and tasty! 
[Click it to big it, via]
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